One month and 11 days after pulling the boys from daycare, Aden asked about it. In fact, because he hadn't said anything to that point, I wondered if he even missed it. And since Ethan couldn't be happier staying home with me, I was starting to feel slightly less guilty about it all. Slightly.
But then one month and 11 days after I was laid off, the boys were at the table beginning to eat lunch and I was in the kitchen when I heard Aden say, "Why aren't we going to school?"
I thought I misheard him and asked him what he had said. He asked again why they weren't going to school. I explained that mommy doesn't have a job right now, so they are able to stay at home with me until I find something new. I asked if he missed school and he said he did sometimes. I asked what he missed about school and he said, "I miss my friends."
Heart. Break.
I know it's hard to have friends that he played with everyday, has basically grown with them for nearly 4 years and suddenly, without notice, he no longer sees them. I've been there. I also feel terrible that he isn't learning the types of things he was learning when he was at the school. He'd come home with all kinds of stories and songs. I teach him these things too, and I teach him to write his letters and am trying to teach basic addition and counting to 100. But Aden is the type who learns better with peers. So again... I'm feeling guilty.
On the other hand, Ethan LOVES the situation. He has a whole house to explore now that he's mobile, rather than a small room, and he gets to eat his food and my food and maybe a few treats that he sweet talks me into along the way. He gets constant love and attention, lots of mommy kisses and gets TONS of field trips and outside time. And best of all, he gets to play with Aden all day. Aden is his favorite playmate.
Meaning, when I'm employed again, I'll feel great that Aden is able to play with his friends again and will be able to come home and tell me all that he has learned, but I'll be sitting at my new job miserably thinking about Ethan and knowing that he is missing his home, his mommy and his Aden.
1 remarks:
This is my blog reading catch up day...I feel ya on the guilt. I felt the same way when Kylie got pulled from pre-school. Months later when I saw her she was still talking about Madison, Avery, Chase and Connor...the ones she seemed to be closest to. She missed them and she didn't understand why one day she was there happy as a clam and the next day her whole world was turned upside down. Her situation was different just because she lost so much at once but I know it must be hard to have him ask questions and know this is one thing you cannot fix for him, right now. I'm just glad you're enjoying your time off with them and some day when Aden looks back he won't think about the friends he missed, he'll remember the super fun summer he had with his baby brother and his mommy :)
Post a Comment